Tuesday, December 23, 2003

Sunday night two guys that I graduated with died in a wreck. They were both under the influence of drugs and alcohol. I don't know why it is always so surreal to me when people die...especially young people...people my same age. I don't think that I ever talked to either one of these guys, but it still leaves me with a feeling of...well I am not really sure how it makes me feel. Why is it that things like this are the only things that make me realize how precious life is...

Saturday, December 20, 2003

I was watching the Nutcracker tonight at the Bass Hall and I came to a realization. After I got over the initial shock of the fact that the nutcrackers head flew off at a time in which it was obviously not suppose to, I once again got back into the beauty of the ballet. This being my first time to ever see the Nutcracker, or a ballet of any kind, I was completely captivated. I started to think of how much better life would be if it was a ballet. If every day was taken with the fluidity and grace that is required of a ballet, think of how beautiful life would be. And what if music was the only thing that pushed us into the next big thing. Who knows... it would be pretty interesting to me...

Friday, December 19, 2003

Ok... so it's 2:00 in the morning and once again... I am still not asleep. This sucks...I am not a fan of this. I am wondering if maybe I should be worried about the fact that I have not had more than 10 hours of sleep this whole week. One thing is for sure... I definately have to stop driving...

Thursday, December 18, 2003

I really, really wanted to sleep in today. Unfortunately I have this thing called a mother...who always seems to call in the middle of my sad excuse for a REM cycle. A funny story... last night my family ate at Texas Roadhouse. My parents got steaks and I got a grilled chicken salad. About 15 minutes after we ordered, we hear a very large crash or plates and such. A few minutes later, our waiter, who I am pretty sure was on something very strong, told us that the loud crash was our food. Ok... no big deal. 15 minutes later, they bring out our food. My salad... was fried...not grilled...like I ordered. 10 minutes later, I finally receive my grilled chicken salad. Much to my dismay... I was no longer hungry. The salad went into a to-go box. Anywho, now that I have written this ridiculously long story that is probably so not funny since you weren't there...I am going to go. I have a date with destiny...

Wednesday, December 17, 2003

Ho hum...another day gone and once again I have nothing interesting to show for it. I have decided that I have a sleeping problem. The truth is... I suck at it. I don't know if one can suck at sleeping, but if at all possible... I do it. For some reason, as soon as my head hits the pillow, no matter how tired I am, I start thinking. It would be ok if these thoughts were deep and meaningful...but they are not. Mostly they are shallow thoughts about what I would look like if I had this or what would it be like if I had this, and so on and so on. To tell you the truth... I'm not sure I would know how to react to a full nights sleep. I am pretty sure my husband is going to hate me....

Tuesday, December 16, 2003

I hope that the comments thing works...

I discovered a new coffe drink that is absolutely magnificant. Something to the effect of a Sugar-Free milano? Anywho, hazelnut, chocolate, and cinnamon! Wonderful... Wonderful... and the best part is that it's all made with Splenda! (Borders)

After about 20 attempts at going to sleep last night (and after failing miserably) I've decided to stop trying and go with the morning. It's kind of depressing but like most depressing things in my life... I'll get over it! You should know that at this moment... what I have on... absolutely does not match and I have to tell you... I don't hate it! Ok OK... so there are a million things in life that I don't understand, but for me, one of the hardest things to decipher, is patience. Is it hereditary or is it something that we have to make happen. It's one of those things that I know no one in my family has, so does that mean I'm screwed or is something that I can acquire. I asked one of my friends about it the other day and he told me that I am the one who decides whether or not I have patience. That being the case...my constant praying for it seems unnecessary. But I think there is more to it than what I can do....

Monday, December 15, 2003

Song song song... this is one of my songs! Please.... tell me what you think! (If you can think of a name... let me know!)

As I sit on top of the world tonight
I can see it as it is
And it scares me to know
That this sight is real
And I can't stand the way this feels

But this cloud, begins to fade
And I'm headed towards the ground
Oh it's time to make a change
I'm gonna turn this world around

Chorus:Cuz I've been sittin on angel's wings
Un in the sky
And I've been seeing what they have seen
And oh how it makes me cry

I can see, his face, as she starts to cry
And I can feel their pain, as she says goodbye
They're so afraid, of what's to come
Things have to change, but why
Where will she go, what will she do
When will she learn to fly

But this cloud begins to fade
And I'm headed toward the ground
Oh it's time to make a change
I'm gonna turn this world around

(Chorus Again)

Bridge: Oh what happened to the good old days
When everything was a-ok
And no one had to cry themselves to sleep
What happened to the love we shared
What happened to the times we cared
What happened to the better days of old