Saturday, April 30, 2005

Have you ever noticed how much easier it is to recreate something bad that has happened in your life than it is to recreate something that made you feel good? I can think of a million crappy things that have happened to me and they will still have the same crappy affect on me years after the fact. But with good things, I never again feel the full euphoria that came with that specific moment. It is absolutely unobtainable. I wonder if that is just me or if it is a human thing. The mind is a funny thing...almost as funny as the heart. It's amazing how two things that work together to keep you alive can work so hard at dividing you. Maybe I'll start thinking with my throat...that's about half way between my head and my heart. One of the most surreal sensations for me is when something makes my head and my heart feel two completely different things. How is it that some things can blow our minds, and not our hearts? How is it that I just wrote this entire blog without having any idea what I said...

I think I like my heart better than my mind...

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Yesterday is gone, but it still consumes my mind
It's moving on
I'm staying here

The world is spinning in my ear, and it's the sound of it I fear
I close my eyes
And wait, for the rain

--Cause when I woke up this morning
There was a cloud outside my door
Where was my silver lining
I swear I've seen this day before
Rain falls, on everyone
And it grays away the sun
So fall away, we'll stay today
Is almost done

We spend our lives, just trying to find
The meaning of, the reasons why
We cry our tears

Our lives are never what they seem
Until we fly into our dreams
We close our eyes
And wait for the night

Friday, April 15, 2005

So I wasn't going to start this post with so, but I lied. I do that sometimes. I don't really know what to blog about and I have sat at my computer every day wishing that I had something profound and heartfelt to blog about, but such luck. I did make the Texas Tech twirling line, which was exciting. But then, I guess I was just kidding because I told them I didn't want to do it. Weirdo...Anyway, I'm sitting here in my wretched dorm room wishing I were anywhere but here. Not because I am unhappy, but mostly because living in a dorm sucks. My friend Lindsey and I are getting an apartment in the fall (not to worry, I haven't lost it, it just so happens that my friend's name really is Lindsey) so that's exciting. My life is pretty lethargic right now, nothing really new and exciting going on...but I'm beginning to understand that that's ok. I appreciate the not so simple task of just existing now more than I ever have. I love my friend Lindsey, everyone in the world is getting married, and I have a new boyfriend named Cody. After three years of the only thing really keeping us apart being age, we finally crossed the barrier and things make sense. He is at least 5,643 cups of awesomeness, and I'm pretty crazy about him. I got a lovely yellow TTU parking ticket on my car this morning...that was nice. Some people have Lucky Charms for breakfast...others have a 25 dollar ticket for parking in your own dorm parking lot. Well...I've managed to blog quite a bit about nothing, so I'm going to do something else. Katherine I miss you, and congratulations on the engagement Steve! To anyone else who may read this blog...I hope your life is beautiful. =)=)